Friday, December 29, 2023

Awake

I thank you God or whoever controls the dreams. 

You gave me a glimpse, although imperfect, vivid. 

It was color you have never ever shown me. 

A tortured soul living in the past of regret. 


There were some bright moments that caught me by surprise. 


It wasn’t the me from the past, it was the me from today. 


It wasn’t her from our past, it was her from today. 


I can paint the dream, if I could paint. 


I want to write the storyline and remember it.


I’ve never dreamed so hard. 


I woke up thankful Lord. You were trying to tell me something. 


Something I just don’t understand. 


For the life of me, it was all about chasing her, chasing happiness. 


I told you I was grateful Lord. 


I am grateful for her, although she is not in my life in the physical sense; why does she haunt my dreams almost 30 years later. I laugh. As if I have any control…


I smiled at the dream. You never hear anything in the dream. You just see and act. It was dramatic…the same ways it had been dramatic. Life. 


You may have told me all that I am allowed to know….

And that is okay Lord….

At least I have the dream…

I never stopped loving her.